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I learned about stocked pantries and grocery deals from my dad, who was the grocery shopper extraordinaire in our home. My father used to take us girls with him (there were four of us) on Saturdays to go grocery shopping. I always supposed it was because he wanted our input into which cereals and candies we would prefer he purchased. Right. Today, I realize that he was just a glutton for punishment and that my mother was blessed. Ladies and Gents. Take lessons. My father was the original liberated man. Dad taught me that one need not limit one’s focus to one store for all grocery needs. He searched ads from all of the local establishments, compared prices and made lists. He had a tight budget and lots of mouths. But I do remember buggies full to the brim and running over. My dad also taught me, by example, to get to know the checkers, managers and service people so that a shopping experience was not only pleasant and fun, but also if any problems arose they would be dealt with quickly and cordially. One might say that I inherited the family “bargain” gene on the DNA strand of competitive shopping. The game is, “find it cheap” and the rule is…well…there are no rules except “free is best”. |
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Now, as the grocery shopper in my own family, I have come to realize that I continue to learn many unique truths on each excursion. The following are some of the things that I have learned. They are real. The names and dates have been omitted to protect the innocent: 1. The older you are and the younger the clerk the greater the chance that you will be called “honey” or “dear” or “sweetheart”. Live with it. 2. If there is a bathtub in the store, hooked up as a decorative fountain, there is the possibility that people from other countries may assume that it is available for real baths for their small child, and that said child may bolt from said parent, running stark naked through the store, eventually attaching to your leg for cover. (Yep, really happened) 3. Salmon comes in cans that are wider at the top and narrower at the bottom to accommodate the salmons’ little tails and big heads. (no joke – I really was informed of this by a young checkout clerk) 4. If lemons are four for $1 and you buy three lemons, if your checkout clerk is under 30, you will cause him no end of mathematical grief. 5. On a trip to Georgia, at a famous specialty grocery store – which shall go unnamed – I was enlightened by a fresh-faced, ponytailed, young man of the following: If Oklahoma is north of Texas (“It is, isn’t it?”), the reason that no famous specialty grocery store – which shall go unnamed – can be found in either state is because the trucks cannot make it over the mountains of Texas and Oklahoma. No kidding? “Oklahoma -where the wind comes whipping down the PLAIN”? |
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Yes, grocery store shopping has taught me that life is never too short for humor, kindness and a smile. Here’s hoping that your shopping experience is a pleasant one. And I promise that salmon are quite a bit bigger than those little, pink cans. |
Great advice! Thanks for sharing, and God Bless you.
(:D)