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I learned about stocked pantries and grocery deals from my dad, who was the grocery shopper extraordinaire in our home. My father used to take us girls with him (there were four of us) on Saturdays to go grocery shopping. I always supposed it was because he wanted our input into which cereals and candies we would prefer he purchased. Right. Today, I realize that he was just a glutton for punishment and that my mother was blessed. Ladies and Gents. Take lessons. My father was the original liberated man. Dad taught me that one need not limit one’s focus to one store for all grocery needs. He searched ads from all of the local establishments, compared prices and made lists. He had a tight budget and lots of mouths. But I do remember buggies full to the brim and running over. My dad also taught me, by example, to get to know the checkers, managers and service people so that a shopping experience was not only pleasant and fun, but also if any problems arose they would be dealt with quickly and cordially. One might say that I inherited the family “bargain” gene on the DNA strand of competitive shopping. The game is, “find it cheap” and the rule is…well…there are no rules except “free is best”. |
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Now, as the grocery shopper in my own family, I have come to realize that I continue to learn many unique truths on each excursion. The following are some of the things that I have learned. They are real. The names and dates have been omitted to protect the innocent: 1. The older you are and the younger the clerk the greater the chance that you will be called “honey” or “dear” or “sweetheart”. Live with it. 2. If there is a bathtub in the store, hooked up as a decorative fountain, there is the possibility that people from other countries may assume that it is available for real baths for their small child, and that said child may bolt from said parent, running stark naked through the store, eventually attaching to your leg for cover. (Yep, really happened) 3. Salmon comes in cans that are wider at the top and narrower at the bottom to accommodate the salmons’ little tails and big heads. (no joke – I really was informed of this by a young checkout clerk) 4. If lemons are four for $1 and you buy three lemons, if your checkout clerk is under 30, you will cause him no end of mathematical grief. 5. On a trip to Georgia, at a famous specialty grocery store – which shall go unnamed – I was enlightened by a fresh-faced, ponytailed, young man of the following: If Oklahoma is north of Texas (“It is, isn’t it?”), the reason that no famous specialty grocery store – which shall go unnamed – can be found in either state is because the trucks cannot make it over the mountains of Texas and Oklahoma. No kidding? “Oklahoma -where the wind comes whipping down the PLAIN”? |
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Yes, grocery store shopping has taught me that life is never too short for humor, kindness and a smile. Here’s hoping that your shopping experience is a pleasant one. And I promise that salmon are quite a bit bigger than those little, pink cans. |
Archive for the ‘Humorous’ Category
A Supermarket Education or “What I’ve Learned From Grocery Clerks”
Thursday, January 21st, 2010
Sourdough Bread on the Oklahoma Prairie (and recipe)
Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009Sourdough bread is the oldest kind of leavened bread known to man. It is earliest recorded in Egypt around 1500 BC, but how it was discovered is total conjecture. There are all kinds of good stories regarding the discovery of the potent dough, but it is anybody’s guess how the first person suddenly decided to use wild yeast to make their usual flatbread rise to a fluffy loaf. Of course, with all of the brewed products available back then, like wines and beers, it is conceivable that some might have spilled into flatbread dough or that dough was left out and attracted the plentiful wild yeasts to produce a bubbly sponge, but I’ll leave you to your imagination to come up with “the story” of how sourdough starter was discovered.
My own imagery conjures up a man who stumbles home after a night out with the boys, precariously grasping a clay jar of strong Egyptian beer (brandname Pharoah’s Choice), and occasionally managing to find his lips to take another swig. As he wobbles into his humble abode, he finds his dutiful wife on her knees, mixing a batch of dough to bake for the next day’s flatbread allotment. Mr. Ancient Egyptian lunges toward his wife to give her a drunken hug, as she stands to greet him, and as if in slow motion, the clay jar of suds pitches out of his loose grip, flies through the air and lands squarely on the floor, shattering to pieces and sending waves of dark ale into Mrs. Ancient Egyptian’s bowl of flour and oil. Mrs. Ancient Egyptian lets loose with a string of hieroglyphics and cries over her ruined bread. The mess goes into the trashbin, also made of pottery, and the angry wife stomps off to bed. Next morning, she awakens to find an oozing, bubbly live thing, growing in her trashbin and out of curiosity, the Mrs. pours the doughy sponge into her floured breadbowl because she didn’t have an Oklahoma Pastry Cloth™, picks out any bones that had also been thrown into the trash from dinner the night before, adds some flour and then bakes the dough in her 400 degree brick and mortar oven. Out comes a tall, fluffy confection that she tentatively samples. A smile gradually replaces her angry frown and she comments, (in ancient Egyptian of course) “This bread is tangy and light – a veritable pastry worthy of royalty! I would think that it would be quite good with jam and tea.” As a result, she forgives her husband and encourages him to come home and drop his ale into her bread on a regular basis. I’m sure that it happened that way.
Sourdough starters are made with a variety of ingredients. Depending on the taste desired, milks, potato water, sugars, and various types of flours are incorporated to create a “sponge”. This sponge is continually “fed” to keep the yeast alive and thriving and as it is nursed, it develops its own particular flavor. Personal taste determines which characteristics are desirable or not.
Just a bit of historical trivia: According to www.kitchenproject.com, during the gold rush days in San Fransisco, California, a bakery run by the Boudin family from France used sourdough culture to create a unique and famous bread that miners enjoyed every morning. Since 1849 they have been using the same sourdough culture, which they call a “Mother dough” and the same recipe. So important is their “Mother Dough” it was heroically saved by Louise Boudin during the Great San Francisco Earthquake of 1906. Here in Oklahoma, sourdough starter has been used on the prairie through days of wagon trains, landruns and cattle drives to produce biscuits, pancakes, muffins and bread. It doesn’t take long to find a class here, where one may learn to create these morsels in a dutch oven nestled in the coals of a campfire.
Every sourdough sitter considers their starter to be the best. As in the case above, many starters have been handed down through generations of bread bakers. However, it is possible for you to start your own legacy and tweek it to your own taste. You can make the base recipe that follows, and then divide it to keep some going as a pristine culture and experiment with various additives like milk or potato water instead of just plain water on the rest. Also, as your culture becomes exactly what you like, it is a good idea to pour some onto wax paper and allow it to dry into a flat sheet that can be broken into small pieces and stored in a tightly sealed jar. If something horrible happens to your live culture, you can start over by adding two tablespoons of dried culture with 2 tablespoons of water to reconstitute and bring to room temperature and then start your usual process over again with this base.
If you are not going to use your starter for a time, you can put it in a jar with a tight fitting lid and store it in the refrigerator. I have also had luck with freezing cubes of my starter to then thaw to room temperature and start the process over. And one last tip that I use: I use bottled spring water to hydrate my starter, as city water has chlorine that kills the yeast and well water can have bacterias that ruin the taste.
I have tried a variety of starters and have come up with my favorite that is very, very simple. If you wish to be truly “pioneer”, then you would omit the yeast and let this starter stand for three days, stirring once each day, to capture any wild yeast in the air. When you start seeing bubbles, you start the “feeding” process. I personally like the flavor achieved from adding a little powdered yeast to get started. Again, if you wish to be “pioneer” in making the true, slow, sourdough bread then you would follow my bread recipe, ommitting the yeast and allow your dough to rise for as long as 24 hours, but I am including in the recipe, two teaspoons of yeast in case you do not wish to wait that long to have bread and still have the sourdough flavor.
Starter Recipe
3 tbsps whole wheat four
2 1/2 tbsps warm water
1 tsp powdered yeast
In a crock container or other opaque glass jar, mix ingredients with a wooden or plastic spoon. Do not use any metal utensils or containers. Allow to stand overnight, covered with cheese cloth. Next day, stir in 2 more tbsps of flour and 1 1/2 tbsps water. Stir and let stand overnight. Continue this process each day of using 2 tbsps flour (you can use white flour at this point) to 1 1/2 tbsp water until you have approximately 1 1/4 cups of starter. At that point, you have enough to make a loaf of bread. You must have enough starter to be able to remove 1 cup and still have some left to continue feeding for the next time. As the starter grows, it should be bubbly and pungent. Overnight, if a liquid rises to the top, just stir it in and continue feeding. Each time you make bread, it is a good idea to transfer all of the starter into a clean jar or bowl and wash the container that houses the starter to keep mold from ruining it. Dry the container and return any culture that is left after removing a cup and start the feeding process again.
To make bread:
1 cup sourdough starter at room temperature
3/4 cups warm water
2 tsps yeast
2 tbsps honey or sugar
1/4 tsp baking soda
2 tsp dough enhancer (lecithin)
3 cups high gluten flour either whole wheat or white or combination of both
Sprinkle yeast over the surface of the 3/4 cups warm water and allow to “proof” or dissolve in the water and bubbling to the top.
In a mixer with a dough hook, place starter, honey or sugar and yeast water along with one cup of flour, salt, enhancer and soda. Mix to blend.
Dough enhancer can be purchased at Sonrise Grains
Gradually add second cup of flour. Continue mixing. Add third cup in stages because you may not need all of it. The thickness of your starter will determine how much flour you use. Your dough should pull away from the sides of the bowl. If it does not, add more flour. If it appears too dry, you may add a little more water. This picture shows the dough too dry.
This is better
Using the dough hook on low speed, knead the dough for 8-10 minutes. It should be smooth and easily formed into a ball.
Put the dough out onto the Oklahoma Pastry Cloth™ and form into a ball. Wrap in plastic wrap and allow to rest for 10 minutes.
In a bowl, pour a tablespoon of olive oil into the bottom and place the dough, topside down, into the oil. Turn right side up to coat the dough ball in oil.
Cover with a warm, damp towel and allow to rise until doubled. If not adding yeast, allow to rise in a bowl that is covered with a wet towel and then covered in plastic wrap. Rise for anywhere from 8 -12 hours until doubled. The longer the rise, the stronger the flavor.
When risen, punch the dough down and put out onto pastry cloth and pat out to 1 inch thick. (If not using yeast, knead in a little flour.) With oil on your hands, wipe the dough with oil and then begin rolling toward you like a jelly roll, firmly pressing the edges into the dough. Continually oiling your hands, continue rolling until loaf is created. Tuck ends under. On a cookie sheet or Italian loaf pan, oil the pan and sprinkle with corn meal. Place loaf onto cookie sheet or into pan and cut diagonally with scissors to make slashes. Cover with warm, wet towel and let rise until double. (If not using yeast in the recipe, cover with towel and spray water mist onto the towel occassionally to keep it moist as it rises for 1 to 4 more hours.)
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Spray the bread with a mist of cold water before placing into oven and then bake for 20 minutes until browned. Turn bread over in the Italian loaf pan and bake 4 minutes longer to brown bottom.
Remove from oven and cool on rack. While hot, you can brush melted butter over the bread. Cover bread with towel as it cools for 30 minutes to make the crust soft yet crunchy.
Slice and serve. And it IS good with jam and tea!!
You Say Tomato; I say To-mah-to
Wednesday, July 29th, 2009
Many years ago, when I was in high school, my family, on their way to a summer in Maine, stopped to visit The Brotherhood of Christians also known as The Bruderhof, in Rifton, New York. At that time, any visitor joined in with the work that was the life sustaining neccessity required of every member of the community. The community produced and processed its own food, had its own school, and had a toy factory that manufactured very special and well-made wooden toys. The atmosphere was pleasant, friendly and quiet, but my sisters and I – looking forward to proms, graduation and meeting friends at the mall – were unsure about this way of life that was so alien to us. We were city girls who had no concept of being shut away from the world.
I truthfully have just scattered memories of the time spent at this community of The Bruderhof. Men and women dressed in the same style of dress, small apartments and a huge community ‘mess hall’ where all shared a meal at noon – a dish that we dubbed ‘Community Casserole’ that was a delicious combination of sauteed onions, celery, ground beef and rice, tea time, my father returning from a day in the toy factory all covered in sawdust and a farm of livestock and gardens that fascinated me, comprise the main of my recollections. However, spending a day peeling tomatoes for ketchup production stands out the most in my memory. I had never seen so many tomatoes in one place and I had never experienced peeling blanched tomatoes; skins slipping off of not-quite-soft whole tomatoes, juice running between fingers, across palms and down the forearm to drip, elbow as a spigot, onto the floor, into the lap or by happenstance into the bowl. To me, it was hillarious that I was even doing it and it has since become a family laugh. I’m pleased to remember that I threw myself into the work with gusto and considered that I was playing an important role in the continuing existence of this group of people…ok…so I’m pleased to remember it that way, but I’m pretty sure that I was not all that altruistic or enthusiastic.
It was the copper kettles that form my vision of the day the most. In the large room where we worked, a huge copper kettle over flames contained boiling water into which fresh tomatoes were dropped for an instant and then retrieved to put into ice water. These cooled tomatoes were transferred to us, peelings split and curling, ready for our knives to help continue the process of removing the skins and cores. The naked tomatoes were then sent to other large copper kettles where they were boiled down with spices and vinegar to make ketchup. It was my introduction to “canning” and left an indelible impression of heat, moisture and the overpowering smell of warm tomatoes. Those sensations revisit me every year as I now produce my own tomato products from the juicy, red jewels gathered from my garden. Who knew back then, that this city girl was a farm girl at heart?!
And so, with this post, I thought that I would invite you into my kitchen for a quick lesson on canning tomatoes. I have had a bumper crop this year with several “pounders” or larger, with an average size of nearly 3/4 pounds per tomato. I have had no hornworms or aphids and the typical fungus prone to Oklahoma seems to be in check. Blossom-end rot appeared at first, but was nipped in the bud (pun intended) by a healthy dose of lime and I have had no need for any kind of pest control at all. What a great year! I feel pressed to make use of every garden gift, wasting nothing, realizing that in Oklahoma next year may be a total bust!
Canning Quartered Tomatoes
Step 1: Wash fresh, firm tomatoes and leave whole. Bring water to a boil in a large stockpot and drop in tomatoes until full. Allow water to return to a boil, but watch for tomatoes as skins begin to split. Remove those tomatoes one by one and drop into iced water.
Step 2: In order to catch extra juice, over a large bowl remove the top center of each tomato with stem and lift peel off of the fruit. Place refuse into a second bowl. Quarter the tomatoes and place into the large bowl.
You can also juice the tomatoes and can just the juice if you like. My GreenLife Juicer makes quick work of the tomatoes.
Step 3: Place tomatoes and juice into canning jars to within 1/2″ of the top of the jar. Add 1/2 tsp. canning or uniodized salt to each pint or 1 tsp to each quart. Use a knife to gently move around the inside perimeter of the jar to remove any air bubbles.
Step 4: With a damp cloth, wipe the tops of the jars to remove any juice, salt or pulp. Using lids that have been boiled and then kept warm in the water, place lids and rings onto jars and tighten, but not too tight.
Step 5: Because tomatoes are so acidic, they do not have to be pressure-canned like green beans and other low acid foods. The process used to can tomatoes is called ‘waterbath canning’ and is much less time consuming. A waterbath canner is simply a stainless or enameled large stock pot with a rack. Fill the canner about halfway with cool water and balance the rack on the top edge of the pot out of the water. The rack has handles that help to accomplish this. Place the jars into the rack and, when full, lower the rack of jars into the water. If the water level is not one inch over the tops of the jars, add more water. Bring the water to a boil and at the point of boiling, set a timer for 10 minutes. When the timer sounds, turn off the heat and using tongs to catch the handles and oven mits to protect hands, carefully lift the rack out of the boiling water and replace onto the top edge of the canner.
Step 6: Using canning tongs, remove jars from rack and place onto a kitchen towel on a counter to cool. Listen for the pingy pop that indicates that the vacuum has completed. Make sure that when the jars are cooled that the lids are flat with no give. If a lid has a bump in the center and pops when pressed, the jar did not seal and must be refrigerated or used immediately. Store vacuumed jars in pantry.
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